I’ve had a couple conversations with friends, family and colleagues lately about achieving goals – both personal and professional – and it surprised me how lost and frustrated many seemed to feel. I was also surprised at how often I heard a sense of entitlement and helplessness in their comments. I’m no motivational speaker or personal coach, but there are a few things I try to Accept and Do in my life in order to achieve my goals; hopefully they will help you get closer to yours…
Things to Accept
- The world doesn’t owe you anything. This is hard to accept. As innately self-interested, selfish humans many of us feel that at some level, the universe, society, our family or other groups owe us a shot at our dreams. I hate to be the bearer of bad news, but they don’t. They can certainly help and support us, but we are not entitled to a red carpet leading to personal or professional success.
- It (whatever ‘it’ is) will be hard. Another difficult thing to accept. Hard stuff takes effort; wouldn’t it be great if love, success, wealth and other wonderful things just fell into our laps? Anything that brings you true joy is worth working hard for, and unfortunately, you’re going to have to work hard for it. When you achieve it, use that feeling of gratitude and accomplishment as motivation for tackling the next goal.
- You will fail and it will suck. Serial entrepreneurs seem to understand this better than anyone and I applaud them for it. Failing feels terrible and often has a lasting negative impact on our self-esteem. It’s so hard to pick yourself up after you fail – but you have to – and you’ll likely be pleasantly surprised by how much you learned from your failure. Those lessons can serve as motivation for doing ‘it’ better next time.
- Your limitations. We all wish we were better, smarter, stronger, faster, etc. It’s natural to want to improve yourself, but often, significant improvement comes when you accept and like yourself for who you are, regardless of things you have or have not achieved. This isn’t an excuse not to try, but at some point, we need to cut ourselves some slack.
Things to Do
- Stop complaining and making excuses. Right now. Why? Because it’s self-defeating – we believe what we tell ourselves and if we’re constantly listing all the reasons why we can’t do something, then that will likely become reality. Additionally, it doesn’t make others want to help you, and I can’t remember the last time I achieved something without help.
- Surround yourself with people you respect and admire. The people you choose to interact with have a direct and profound effect on your level of motivation and access to opportunity. Spend time with people who are achieving goals themselves and allow them to inspire you.
- Share your goals with your network. Those high-achieving, inspirational folks mentioned above can’t help you if they don’t know what your goals are. Regularly share your goals and dreams, as well as your progress toward them, with a group of trusted friends and colleagues. You may be pleasantly surprised by how many offers of help and support you receive.
- Ask for help; then actually use it. I’m often asked to keep my eyes open for job opportunities for other marketers and people in my network. I’m continually amazed (and truthfully, a little disappointed) at how rarely the opportunities I send are followed up on. Asking for help isn’t enough – you actually have to act on the help that’s provided to you. The assistance you’re given will not always be stellar, or even relevant, but you can’t sit back and congratulate yourself for simply asking; it won’t get you any closer to your goal.
- Repeat. You achieved a goal – great! Got any others? Think of goal achievement as a process, not a destination. And remember to give back – you can be one of those high-achieving, inspirational people for others.
Like I said, I’m no motivational speaker or life coach, but I do actively think about these things in my life and I’ve found them helpful. I think much of it comes from picking myself up from a failed marriage, working for a company that advises struggling (and often failing) companies and, frankly, great advice from my dad. I hope these remarks help readers Accept challenges and Do things that motivate and lead to success – however you define it.
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I'm an idealist... and a marketer. 